I can't breathe without you but I have to.
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Words : 2508 words.
*This is for a contest.
Once upon a time, in a big city called Seoul, was a tiny apartment room. In it lived a caring mother and loving father with their beloved daughter. Well, the daughter is me.
Today, 7th October, is my best friend's birthday. I've known her for so long and I've grown attached to her. We've been through hard times together. So, in connection with her birthday,I've decided that I shall get her a gift since it's Saturday and I have the day off.
I asked my parent either I can go out or not and to my delight, they said yes. With my earphones connected to my freshly charged iPod, I grabbed my skateboard which was leaning on my bedroom door and slipped my sneakers on as I wished goodbye to my parents and went off.
The weather outside was quite nice. Windy and slightly cloudy, just the way I like it. The streets were nearly empty, so it's easier to skate my way to Myondong market.
Cold wind hit my face. Dang, I forgot it's November. It's getting colder, I thought as I pulled my sweatshirt's sleeve to make it longer for it to blanket half of my fingers. I even tried to rub my hands together , so that the friction it made could warm me. Alas, it made no effect on me.
Baring with no warmth for 15 minutes or so, I finally made it to Myondong market. I stepped on the edge of my skateboard, making it flip as I catch it. I held the skateboard in my arms and dug my pocket for my hand phone, which I then use to call my parents and inform them that I've safely arrived so they won't worry. It was a nice day to be out shopping, having some time of your own, I smiled to the thought of that.
Eventually, I found a pretty little shop, simple and kawaii-like, after walking for a while. 'Tiny Trinklets and Treasures' says the pink sign. The shop's display mirror was decorated with Hello Kitty, which was my best friend's favourite. Happy, I opened the shop doors which made a cat sound as I went in.
I was greeted by warm, friendly, welcoming smile which was worn by a really, really tall male. Black shining hair, as soft as the clouds drifting in the wide blue sky. He gave me a little bow and said hi. I bowed back and smiled.
"Hello ma'am. Welcome to Tiny Trinklets and Treasures" He said. "How may I help you?"
I just carved a smile and stayed quiet and began walking around the tiny shop. There was a lot of nicknacks, pretty pink nicknacks. The kind that always caught my eye. I put my skateboard down by the door.
There, in the top shelf, I see an attractive lavender diary. I like the colour and so does my friend. Eyes targeted on the diary, head up, toes on tip toes, I tried to reach the diary. Sadly, my attempt failed.
Then, I saw a hand reached up to grab that book. It was in his hand, the guy who greeted me before. I saw his cheeks lift and his lips curved as he turned to me to give the book.
"You know, you could have asked for help. Would you like to pay for this?" I sheepishly smiled and nodded as I followed him up to the counter.
The guy quickly punched in some number and the price of the diary came out. I handed him the money.
"Thank you" I said with my head down.
"Wow! You talk? " He laughed and tilted his head to get a better view of my face.
With the diary I bought in my hands, I turned around and strode to the door,grabbed my skateboard and walked out. Annoying, I thought of that one word that could describe the boy.
The next day, with my friend's gift in her hands, I felt satisfied. I was the first person to give her a present and to wish her Happy Birthday. It felt great. The day went on as usual besides the party and the new boy in class and that boy was the worker at the shop I bought the gift for my friend.
He actually looked dashing in a uniform,so I admit and he's already getting a lot of fans here, including my best friend. His name was Choi Jonghyun.
It was recess and my best friend and I were eating. Well, I was much doing all the eating while my friend keeps talking about the boy I met at the shop. She keeps going on and on about his smile.
"Hey. Is anyone sitting here?" Jonghyun said, popping out of nowhere. My friend eventually screamed because of her excitement.
"Nah. Go ahead" I said.
Jonghyun then smiled at my friend which made her scream once again and this time, louder. He put his bag down and took the vacant seat.
"I see you've a lot of female fans" I said, avoiding eye contact.
And so the day went on as usual.
It's been 3 months since I've been Ricky. Mom believed me but I can still feel that she's hesitating me. Dad trusts me and so does my best friend. I still don't know how I've managed to become a boy. Some mysteries are better left unsolved, says mom. School went on as usual but I've to register again, since I'm Ricky now. I've been with Jonghyun for 2 weeks now and we're staying strong. All of the girls in my school was really upset to see that the hottest guy there is gay. But the sadness didn't stay for too long because there was a new transfer, Minsoo was his name, I think. Most of the girls are head over heels for Minsoo.
One day, I've got a mysterious letter written in red ink with capital letters in my schoolbag.
I was afraid. I was afraid to tell Jonghyun about this note. I was afraid things would change if I turn back to normal if I meet ' The Dark Lady'. I was afraid that if I go, bad things that I'm not suppose to know might change everything I have with Jonghyun.
The truth was hard to accept once I met The Dark Lady. The day I met Jonghyun for the first time at Myondong Market in November, the first time I saw him smile, the first time I actually felt loved, it had to be the price for me to change back into a girl. Was it a price that I can pay? I don't know. I like being Ricky as much as I like being my old self.
I'm sorry, Jonghyun. I can't breathe without you but I have to.
Title :I Can't Breathe Without You But I Have To.
Lyrics : November-Chase CoyPlace : Myondong Market
Bias :Choi Jonghyun. [Changjo] Words : 2508 words.
*This is for a contest.
Once upon a time, in a big city called Seoul, was a tiny apartment room. In it lived a caring mother and loving father with their beloved daughter. Well, the daughter is me.
Today, 7th October, is my best friend's birthday. I've known her for so long and I've grown attached to her. We've been through hard times together. So, in connection with her birthday,I've decided that I shall get her a gift since it's Saturday and I have the day off.
I asked my parent either I can go out or not and to my delight, they said yes. With my earphones connected to my freshly charged iPod, I grabbed my skateboard which was leaning on my bedroom door and slipped my sneakers on as I wished goodbye to my parents and went off.
The weather outside was quite nice. Windy and slightly cloudy, just the way I like it. The streets were nearly empty, so it's easier to skate my way to Myondong market.
Cold wind hit my face. Dang, I forgot it's November. It's getting colder, I thought as I pulled my sweatshirt's sleeve to make it longer for it to blanket half of my fingers. I even tried to rub my hands together , so that the friction it made could warm me. Alas, it made no effect on me.
Baring with no warmth for 15 minutes or so, I finally made it to Myondong market. I stepped on the edge of my skateboard, making it flip as I catch it. I held the skateboard in my arms and dug my pocket for my hand phone, which I then use to call my parents and inform them that I've safely arrived so they won't worry. It was a nice day to be out shopping, having some time of your own, I smiled to the thought of that.
Eventually, I found a pretty little shop, simple and kawaii-like, after walking for a while. 'Tiny Trinklets and Treasures' says the pink sign. The shop's display mirror was decorated with Hello Kitty, which was my best friend's favourite. Happy, I opened the shop doors which made a cat sound as I went in.
I was greeted by warm, friendly, welcoming smile which was worn by a really, really tall male. Black shining hair, as soft as the clouds drifting in the wide blue sky. He gave me a little bow and said hi. I bowed back and smiled.
"Hello ma'am. Welcome to Tiny Trinklets and Treasures" He said. "How may I help you?"
I just carved a smile and stayed quiet and began walking around the tiny shop. There was a lot of nicknacks, pretty pink nicknacks. The kind that always caught my eye. I put my skateboard down by the door.
There, in the top shelf, I see an attractive lavender diary. I like the colour and so does my friend. Eyes targeted on the diary, head up, toes on tip toes, I tried to reach the diary. Sadly, my attempt failed.
Then, I saw a hand reached up to grab that book. It was in his hand, the guy who greeted me before. I saw his cheeks lift and his lips curved as he turned to me to give the book.
"You know, you could have asked for help. Would you like to pay for this?" I sheepishly smiled and nodded as I followed him up to the counter.
The guy quickly punched in some number and the price of the diary came out. I handed him the money.
"Thank you" I said with my head down.
"Wow! You talk? " He laughed and tilted his head to get a better view of my face.
With the diary I bought in my hands, I turned around and strode to the door,grabbed my skateboard and walked out. Annoying, I thought of that one word that could describe the boy.
The next day, with my friend's gift in her hands, I felt satisfied. I was the first person to give her a present and to wish her Happy Birthday. It felt great. The day went on as usual besides the party and the new boy in class and that boy was the worker at the shop I bought the gift for my friend.
He actually looked dashing in a uniform,so I admit and he's already getting a lot of fans here, including my best friend. His name was Choi Jonghyun.
It was recess and my best friend and I were eating. Well, I was much doing all the eating while my friend keeps talking about the boy I met at the shop. She keeps going on and on about his smile.
"Hey. Is anyone sitting here?" Jonghyun said, popping out of nowhere. My friend eventually screamed because of her excitement.
"Nah. Go ahead" I said.
Jonghyun then smiled at my friend which made her scream once again and this time, louder. He put his bag down and took the vacant seat.
"I see you've a lot of female fans" I said, avoiding eye contact.
And so the day went on as usual.
I woke up from me sleep and got into my bathrobe. My eyes still felt heavy but I had no choice but to wake up since there's school. I rubbed my eyes, not looking at where I was going because I know where the bathroom door was.
The mirror was in front of me. I slowly opened by eyes.
“OH MY GOD!” I screamed and screamed and screamed until I had the guts to believe to what I've become. My body was flat. My voice sounds like a man. My hair was really short. I looked like a guy. I began to touch every part of my body. This can't be happening. I was still a girl last night, A normal, healthy girl.
There's only one way to fine out. I pulled the strapper of my pants,took a deep breath and looked down.
God, it was real. I AM a boy. How did that happen? More importantly, how do I get my old girl body back?
I heard a knocking on my door. It was my mother. Listening to the tone of her voice, she sounds worried.
“Honey? Is there something wrong? I heard your scream from downstairs and came up as soon as possible to what what's happened. Are you alright?”
“No, mom. I'm fine” Then, I remembered that my voice was different. “Just a sore throat. That's all”
My mom said she was worried and then she asked again if I was alright. Again, the question was answered with the same answers. A few moments later, I could hear footsteps. Mom was finally gone.
Honestly, I don't want my mom to see what I've become. She can't see a guy in my room. She can't see me gone. My head was spinning with thoughts. I can feel my hands shaking.
This is mad. This is really,really insane.Who'll I go to for help? I can't possibly go to my parents. Then it hit me. I can go to Jonghyun.
With an extremely thick scarf wrapped around my neck and a cap on my head, I grabbed my skateboard and snooped out of the house and left a note in front of my door saying that I went to school early.
Oh God, what have I done to make myself turn into a guy? Was it something I ate? Did some evil spirit took over my body while I was asleep and did some transformation on me? Was I cursed? I screamed. I had to shake those crazy thoughts out of my head and think logically.
At long last, I was once again in front of the Tiny Treasures and Trinklets. I've never thought I'd set foot into this shop for the second time. Yet, here I am.
“I'm sorry. Jonghyun isn't here. He's at school” said the lady who was incharge.
Damn it. I forgot about school. But how am I suppose to see him at school? People will think I'm weird. Want or not, I have to see him. He's the only male my age that I trust.
“You're who? But you're not a girl! You're a guy for Pete's sake! I'm so going to call the teachers.” Jonghyun said in disbelief.
I rolled my eyes. I thought he was different. I thought he'd believe me. Sadly, I was wrong. Unknowingly, tears started to fall down my cheeks. I started sobbing.
“Hey,hey. Don't cry,man. “ he pat my back and turned around only to see that people are staring.
“I AM NOT A MAN JONGHYUN I AM A GIRL OH MY GOD WHY CAN'T YOU BELIEVE ME?” I exclaimed .
Jonghyun huffed. “Ok. I believe you. Can you stop crying, please? And I think that you'll need a new name now that you're a boy”
I used my sleeves to wipe my eye. “Like what?”
“How about...hmm...Ricky? Sounds like a good boy name” Jonghyun smiled.
“Ricky? Uhh sounds good enough”
Later, when Jonghyun was done for the day, he and I decided to went out for lunch at McDonald's. I just ate a sundae because I wasn't feeling like eating while Jonghyun ate a Hot Zinger he got from KFC since he didn't like Mcdonald's food much.
“So, Ricky. How exactly did you turn into a boy?” Jonghyun asked as he stuffs more food into his mouth.
“I don't know. I woke up and I saw my body's transformation. I felt like punching the mirror” I shrugged.
“Oh. So do your parents know? About the body change?” I stopped sucking on my spoon.
“No, they don't. I don't know how the hell am I suppose to tell them about this. They''ll never believe me. Even I don't believe myself. Imagine having a daughter who changed into a boy one night in her sleep without any logical reasons what so ever”
“How about you stay with me for the week?” he chewed on his Zinger some more.
“Great idea. But how am I suppose to tell my mom about this? What would she say if me,in a girl form, is staying at a guy's house?”
My Blackberry was in my hand. I had my mom on speed dial.
“Umm hey ,mom”
“Honey! Is that you? You're throat is getting worst! Are you okay?” she began throwing questions at me.
“Haha I'm fine. I just ate too much ice cream lately, that's all” I began to assure her that I was alright. “Mom, can I stay at a friend's house tonight? Please?”
The line went silent. “Who is this friend of yours? “
I began faking about Jonghyun about how he was really great at Maths and how he was gonna tutor me. Actually, I lied. Jonghyun was a she when I talked about him on the phone.
My pajamas were huge but at least they're soft. Luckily, Jonghyun had a pajama that fit me. I was tired ,so I asked Jonghyun where I'll be sleeping.
“Well, do you like the bed or the floor?” he asked sarcastically.
“Bed, duh”
“Well, I wan the bed too and since the floor's space is little, I'll take the bad” Jonghyun poked his tongue out.
“What happened to the phrase 'Ladies first'?” He laughed.
“But you're a guy now, Ricky “ I snorted. He was actually getting on my nerves. I clapped my hands.
“Okay. We'll both take the bed. You'll take the left side, I'll take the right”I pointed my finger to the bed.
Actually, it felt weird to be sleeping with a guy, in a guy's body. At the same time, it also felt nice knowing that someone actually believes your crazy story.
I laid my body down next to Jonghyun, who was listening to songs on his iPod. Based on the posters in his room, I can tell that he likes music a lot.
I turned my body so that I can see his face. When he sleeps, he looks calm. It's like he's forgot all his trouble in this world. It's like he's floating on water. Relaxed. His breathing, slow, gentle.
With the blanket up to his nose, he looks like a puppy. Well, since it's November and it's really cold, he wore socks. Pink, heart-shapped socks.
Slowly, I lifted my fingers and guided it up to his nose and touching it softly. My heart felt different. Bbi ribbom, bbe ri bom it goes. Jonghyun's eyelids slowly opened.
“Aren't you sleepy?”Jonghyun groaned.
“Nope. I'm just cold” Jonghyun quickly sat up and asked me either I want some blanket or not. I just said no because I didn't want to trouble him.
Once again , he laid his body onto the mattress with his head turned to me. As if he read my mind, he moved closer, pulling his blanket onto me. He smiled.
“You know what's weird, Ricky? I think I might go gay for you” I giggled.
“But I'm a girl” I could feel his fingers creeping onto my hands. I can feel the coldness down my spine.
It's been 3 months since I've been Ricky. Mom believed me but I can still feel that she's hesitating me. Dad trusts me and so does my best friend. I still don't know how I've managed to become a boy. Some mysteries are better left unsolved, says mom. School went on as usual but I've to register again, since I'm Ricky now. I've been with Jonghyun for 2 weeks now and we're staying strong. All of the girls in my school was really upset to see that the hottest guy there is gay. But the sadness didn't stay for too long because there was a new transfer, Minsoo was his name, I think. Most of the girls are head over heels for Minsoo.
One day, I've got a mysterious letter written in red ink with capital letters in my schoolbag.
MEET ME ALONE AT MYONDONG MARKET IF YOU WISH TO KNOW HOW TO CHANGE BACK
THE DARK LADY
I was afraid. I was afraid to tell Jonghyun about this note. I was afraid things would change if I turn back to normal if I meet ' The Dark Lady'. I was afraid that if I go, bad things that I'm not suppose to know might change everything I have with Jonghyun.
The truth was hard to accept once I met The Dark Lady. The day I met Jonghyun for the first time at Myondong Market in November, the first time I saw him smile, the first time I actually felt loved, it had to be the price for me to change back into a girl. Was it a price that I can pay? I don't know. I like being Ricky as much as I like being my old self.
I'm sorry, Jonghyun. I can't breathe without you but I have to.